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You sound like a radio with the speakers blown

June 6, 2010
  • Title Inspiring Song: “Speakers Blown”-Hit The Lights
  • JUNE, so that means a new cause. With everything that has been going on in the Gulf and with the oil spill there has been quite a spotlight on the environment and protecting the water which we do have. This month I chose to raise money for Surfrider which is a non-profit, grassroots movement started by surfers which is dedicated to the protection and enjoyment of the world’s oceans and waves through conservation, activism, research and education.  Sound like a good cause? Click and raise money for free on the SocialVibe widget. For more information on Surfrider, check out their website: http://www.surfrider.org/default.aspx
  • This week also had the passing of one of the greatest coaches of all time: John Wooden. In addition, to being an amazing coach he was also an inspiring man. In his memory, I felt like sharing one of his quotes with you. “Don’t measure yourself by what you have accomplished, but what you should have accomplished with your ability.” RIP Coach Wooden

“Of those who say nothing, few are silent.”-Thomas Neiel

“Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one’s definition of your life; define yourself.”-Howard Fierstein

Good morning SQ readers! Hope you all had a great week and that you made an effort to live in the moment. This week, I contemplated taking a break from writing SQ posts, but decided against it, for reasons I think this post might get at,  so here I am sharing my thoughts with you on another lovely Sunday!

Silence. Silence is golden right? At times it can be, but not always. How many times have you been thinking something that when you have been called on to share or given an opportunity to express your opinion have you chose to bite your tongue, plead the 5th and remain quiet? After that moment, you dismiss the thought riding it off as stupid and not pertinent. We are often our best judges, but also our biggest critics. That idea might not have wowed everyone immediately, but it could have been the springboard for other great ideas, a great discussion or a better idea for you in the future. By keeping it to yourself, you gain the satisfaction of knowing it, but lose the ability to share it with anyone else.

I am going to get a little personal for you right now using myself as an example. Growing up, I was the typical introvert, bookworm, nerd..etc. In class situations, I was intelligent enough to have an answer prepared, but I was never the one raising my hand, going toe-to-toe with Joe Schmoe in some debate. To someone else I suppose looking from an outsider’s perspective, a silence on my part either meant I had nothing of value to contribute or that I was shy. Looking back on that experience through the lens of the Neiel quote, it was not that I had nothing to contribute. It might have been a combination of the latter reason and others. I am an introvert by nature. Doomed to silence? Ask my friends and they will tell you that definitely is not the case. To me it means that I think best when I take the time to think, process and work out an idea before I vocalize it. Not a sin to me because I know plenty of people who should think before they speak, but it does have its detriments.

Not speaking out and always sharing my opinion made me less obnoxious, but it also hindered me quite a bit. Not sharing those ideas meant that many of them just were passed by and never given the opportunity to grow and develop as they should have. At the same time, we should not all walk around saying exactly what we think about everything.What I am saying is we should feel a little more free to express our thoughts without thinking about how they are going to be viewed by everyone else. Don’t leave it up to other people to form opinions about you and what you believe. Have the courage to speak your mind and define yourself. You never know what could happen..your thought could be something someone remembers enough to mention in conversation to someone else or even nobel-prize worthy. But you’ll never know unless you take that leap and don’t always choose silence. And for those of you who do tend to think and process by talking, maybe take the time to listen. You never know what you might be missing.

I think there should be a new golden role: Talk as much as you listen and listen just as much as you talk.  Try putting it into practice this week.

That’s all for now. Have a great week!

❤ SQ

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8 Comments leave one →
  1. Barbara permalink
    June 6, 2010 10:59 am

    Divya, I enjoyed your thoughts this morning, being a reserved and introverted bookworm myself. Too often trying to define myself has led to me having to defend myself from ridicule… It’s an art finding the right words… One thing I love about writing is that it is a way of communicating without being interrupted. Oftentimes I just can’t keep up with the conversation. By the time something occurs to me to offer, the conversation has moved on to other subjects. But I like your new golden rule – it’s a nice balance to strive for, to contribute without monopolizing the conversation!

    • June 6, 2010 11:27 am

      i’m the same way barbara.
      often i find that i tend to communicate better in a written fashion. it just feels easier to express myself that way. also, i’m glad you like the new golden rule.
      thank you for commenting!

  2. June 7, 2010 3:50 pm

    Oh, how I relate to this. I’m pretty introverted too – although my work requires me to turn up the extrovert. I really don’t like drama or disagreement, so I’m hesitant to share my opinion. But why? Just because I disagree with someone doesn’t mean I’m being unlikeable. It’s good to discuss, to share perspectives, to learn from one another.

    And absolutely, on the other side of the coin, we need to listen. To really *hear* what others are saying, not to just partially listen while we’re really thinking about something else.

    • June 10, 2010 6:07 pm

      agreed. there needs to be more of an open discussion in what we do & we can learn so much from each other if we just take the time to listen and really “hear”
      thank you for commenting eva!

  3. June 13, 2010 8:29 am

    Good morning,
    I stopped by for a Sunday morning read. I followed your Social Vibe link to help out your cause for the month.
    ~kaelee

    http://www.kaeleemorgan.com
    http://onceuponatimeisnow.wordpress.com

    • June 13, 2010 10:20 am

      thank you very much for helping out to raise money for the cause kaelee that’s great and i appreciate that so much
      i’m glad you stopped by for a sunday morning read..a new post should be up pretty soon if you want to check back
      thank you for commenting kaelee!

  4. June 14, 2010 10:49 am

    Very interesting post! I think you have touched on an important issue and that is that dialogue and conversation are essential both to knowledge creation and more generally to the human experience. Not only should we speak when our hearts prompt us to, but try and be more deliberate in our conversations with friends and colleagues. We have lost so much of the art of conversation that we no longer attach great importance to dialogue or discourse.

    • June 14, 2010 12:58 pm

      i agree with you so much in the art of conversation has been lost in terms of the fundamental speaking and listening. maybe that’s due to a new wave of technology encouraging conversations that are very to the point and goal-oriented rather than merely just for the sake of conversation? i don’t know, but for some reason that last idea just popped into my head as a possible explanation.
      thank you for taking the time to comment!

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